True Self

I found myself in Boulder this morning, peering through solid old trees at a charming cottage where I was to meet my new spiritual director. I was apprehensive and unsure of what to expect, but we had a delightful first encounter. Dominie told me that she wanted to provide a "spiritual bounce' and give me work to help develop resilience in this area, which will be valuable after the draining and unsettling events of my illness.

Within the first twenty minutes, Dominie referenced a "secret, undamaged self" which, she explained, is a nondenominational way of describing the God self, the true self or Buddha nature. The concept enchanted me; is it really possible to have a secret self, one that is teflon-coated to all my mental, physical and emotional mistakes?  As we developed this image further it only got better. The true self is vast. warm, unlimited, and it can provide the font of energy and resilience for all that we do.

Can you imagine having an unlimited source of energy that does not spring from coffee, the morning workout, lazy nap time or a charged relationship? I constantly feel that I may run out of energy for the kids, for Rob, for myself. The measuring - out of energy and calculations required to determine how to replace it are exhausting in and of themselves. The idea of having access to an unlimited supply bubbles up the same feeling delight I got when I learned a new yoga pose called "cow face,"  just a sense of 'no way, you've got to be kidding, how great is that!'

 May we all find the 'secret undamaged self' within us and let that self provide us with all that we need.