Family Moab

Family Moab
In Arches National Park

Saturday, September 8, 2012

New Things

"Do not remember the former things, or consider the things of old.
I am about to do a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?"
- Isaiah 43: 18 - 21

I spent twenty amazing minutes in the pool yesterday, carefully monitoring my heartrate and pausing between fifties to breathe deeply and stretch out. This slow re-entry to the water was a baptism of sorts. Swimming is an old activity for me, but my approach is new. In fact, many things now will be new, though I am certainly the same person, with the same crazy personality and same loving family and friends.

My body continues to improve, and as I get stronger I become less anxious about the future and more excited to start a new path. I am eager to spend time with friends again, reveling in the freedom to spend long mornings with them instead of cramped sessions between workouts. I want to return to yoga, start pilates, look for dance classes - any activity where I can stretch myself, be creative, and avoid competition. Of course, I may have to wear a blindfold to entirely avoid comparing myself to others, but hopefully I'll come around!

There remains some grieving to work through. I will miss the energy and adrenaline rush of competition and boot camp class, and I will miss the camaraderie of these activities. I will miss the image of myself as a Super Woman and athletic winner. But I won't miss being tired all of the time, and I won't miss constant nagging injuries, and I certainly won't miss illness.

I am grateful to be emerging into this second chance at living my adult life. I know I need to be careful and not rush into any activities - old or new - but I have enough family and friends to remind me of that! Love to you all - Laura


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