How to Say Sorry in Chinese

The blue-uniformed Chinese girl haunts me.  She came to my ESL class at the detention center and sat at the table, studying her hands, as the other women entered.  When I began my introduction to the class in both English and Spanish she stopped me with a gesture. “No Spanish,” she said.

I asked if she spoke English and she said “only little, most Chinese.”  Stumped, I surveyed the class as they looked at me, waiting: six women from Spanish-speaking countries, three from African countries in head coverings and shawls of bedsheets, and the young Chinese woman. As the African women had fairly good English I could reach all in the room, except for one. 

Hands extended in apology I said “I don’t have any Chinese, I’m sorry. Only xie-xie (Mandarin for thank you).” Most of the class chuckled at my poor attempt, but the girl looked confused. Did she wonder if she was the butt of the joke?  As the class went on, we shared more laughter at my pathetic attempts to illustrate our text on the whiteboard. My students offered their own drawings, and encouraged each other to read aloud so they could get the chocolate bar reward. The young Chinese girl was left out of the laughter, the drawing, and the chocolate.

What is her story? I wonder how she ended up here, unable to communicate. I’m not supposed to ask, and I don’t dare break the rules. I don’t know if my one hour per week offers the detainees anything other than laughter at my expense, but it’s life-changing for me, and I can’t risk losing my volunteer’s badge. But I can’t forget the young Chinese woman, because I know that I failed her.  I hope I get a second chance to offer my sympathy and perhaps a chocolate bar.