Resolutions

A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one Year and out the other. ~ Anonymous

Did you make any New Year’s resolutions? I had largely given them up, but this year I broke down and made two. First, I need to clean the pantry. The boxes are covered with spilled oatmeal, my rice is four years old, and my cookbook pile collapsed long ago, but those problems are easily overlooked. My big issue is that I can no longer find my dark chocolate in its dark recesses. I hide my stash of 70% cacao away from the seeking eyes of children and husband, but to my dismay the clutter in my pantry has now hidden the after-dinner supply from me, as well. I actually have some confidence that I might carry out this resolution, given my nightly craving for sugar.

My second resolution is to say “yes” more to my husband. This includes all crazy schemes and irrational plans that he might concoct. My intention was inspired by a lovely relative who hosted our party of sixteen for dinner last week. Over turkey she told me and my cousin that one ingredient in her recipe for marital success (she’s been married for 42 years) is to say “yes” whenever possible, without eye-rolling, logical rebuttal, or outright laughter. For example, she had returned home late that afternoon from playing nine holes of golf with her spouse. One might understandably push back on the idea of playing golf in forty degree weather on an afternoon when you are hosting dinner for sixteen, but she gave it a whirl. They had a good time, dinner was excellent, and her example was timely and perfect.

So when my husband decided to bring the heavy wooden corn-hole games in the back of the minivan just so we could have a short tournament in the Dinosaur Museum parking lot, what did I say? Did I roll my eyes at the thought of carting them all over the foothills that afternoon for twenty minutes of diversion? Well . . . I thought about it. But then I took a big breath, swallowed my objections, and said “OK, as long as they don’t squash my cake.” Not exactly a ringing endorsement, I grant you, but somewhat of a “yes.” We did have fun with the cornhole game, though it was a bit brisk in the late afternoon and half the group watched from the warmer comfort of their cars.

This advice works the other way, as well, and our hostess gave an example of her husband’s support. Some years ago, when her children were still young, she decided to accompany her sister on a five week trek of the Himalayas. When they talked it over, her husband was supportive, and after making all of the necessary childcare arrangements she took off for Nepal with a group of women. What a cool gift, to be able to say “yes” to your partner. It makes me want to come up with crazy schemes just to test Rob’s acceptance. Of course, after reading this blog he will probably do the same . . .I’ll get back to you on the success of this resolution!