William and I visited Duke and UCLA yesterday, a feat of bi-coastal viewing enabled by magical new virtual tours. The fresh-faced tour reps associated with each university gave a real-time presentation while showing photos of campus markers and reflecting on favorite traditions and events that may no longer happen. Attendees asked questions in the chat boxes and received responses from the tour leaders or facilitators, but these young people can't know the answers to our most significant questions: what will life look like in fall 2021? Will "college" still be possible?
Who knows what form college will take this year or even next year, but our older kids need something to grab hold of as they traverse a journey out of the valley of despair up to the next peak of achievement. CU Boulder rearranged all their classes for the fall semester, switching times and classrooms in order to provide socially distant spaces for small classes and moving large lectures online. Aden now has three classes that overlap, but the university will continue to tinker with schedules through July so there's really no point in worrying.
With work, swimming, significant others and outdoor contact with friends, our older kids are navigating this strange time reasonably well. On the other hand, our fourteen-year-old struggles mightily. Baseball is finally back, and one in-person taekwondo class per week, but otherwise his week is empty and he is too young to get a job. So we "hire" him to paint the back fence, mow and edge the yard, assemble patio furniture, tear up the tower of cardboard boxes that seems to grow each week. That doesn't meet the insatiable and important need of teens to bond with peers, and our efforts to ration phone or screen time have not worked. We're tapped out and concerned.
A dear friend asked me yesterday what I pray for in these confusing days, if I pray for the virus to end, for a vaccine, for the kids' school to resume. I had to admit that I don't pray for any specific outcome - the future is too murky for me to see. Every night I sit with my gratitude journal and force my pen to enumerate our blessings, which flow easily enough once I get started. I don't know what the future holds or even what to ask for, but if I rest each night on gratitude I can find the strength to get up and embrace whatever virtual or true reality comes the next day.
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