Legitimacy

" 'You know,' she said, 'you've always had this desire for legitimacy, and you'll have it forever. It's probably why you went to law school. But should you let it determine your next job?"
'Well..."
'You've already done highly legitimate things, like clerking on the Supreme Court, but do you feel legitimate?'
'Not really.'
'So you probably never will. Okay. Just don't let that drive your decisions.' "
- From Gretchen Rubin's The Happiness Project

My doctor, being holistically minded and caring about my happiness, recommended that I read The Happiness Project. I really enjoy reading the author's steps to happiness, but the above passage stuck out by far the most.  I have a problem feeling legitimate, which is probably why I went to Harvard and then went into consulting when my first love has always been reading, writing, and teaching. Staying home with the kids has never really felt legitimate, and I search the future for some position that occurs between the hours of 9 am and 3:30 pm and which will magically legitimize me.

The words of the author's sister have set me free in a way, by recognizing that some of us never truly feel legitimate - that it's a piece of who we are. Recognizing that there is no magic cure leaves me free to contemplate doing whatever I want to do, and not seek legitimacy from something outside of myself.One thing that I want to do is write more, so as part of that goal I will be entering blog entries on a daily basis (or as near as I can get). It's a venue for me and hopefully a topic of interest for more than one or two of you out there.

To close on a mundane note, I am having trouble 'exiting' phone conversations. It seems that every good-bye process takes over a minute, even when I am speaking with the scheduler at Sleep Number beds. How many ways do two people need to successfully terminate a call?  "Thanks so much", "have a great day," "take care," I'll let you go now," "appreciate it,"  etcetera, etcetera. I am horrified at the thought of cutting someone off by hanging up on them, but lingering on the phone just makes it necessary to say something more. Advice welcome....and good-bye!