Cutting

 We had our Family Day brunch on Sunday and sat outside blinking in the bright Colorado sunshine as icicles dripped and splattered off the table behind us. The conversation ranged widely from swimming to school classes to politics. Our kids are a bit concerned about what the economy will do when affected by tariffs and job cuts. They can already see the online jobs websites flooded by recent layoffs.

The idea of cutting back on waste and trimming fat is not inherently bad or wrong. Our son, William, even mentioned that he wanted to personally "cut" to get in better aerobic shape and reduce any extra weight (not that he carries much on his 21-year-old frame).  But ruthless cuts can injure a body, a staff, a company, a country. 

Let's look at National Parks, for example, whose staff recently lost 1,000 full-time positions. My family and friends visit National Parks several times per year and we rely on staff to let us in, help us park, provide clean restrooms and maintain trails. Not only have these staffers lost their dream job - for which they are highly qualified - but park visitors will not see helpful rangers, not experience clean facilities,  not receive medical aid after injuries and face more threats from wildfires. 

These cuts are reckless. There is no plan for how to operate our National Parks going forward, no fall-back, no appreciation for the importance of our National spaces. National Parks have been flooded with visitors since COVID and - despite their growing popularity - have now been carelessly trashed.  If you want to comment on the layoffs please visit npca.org/jobcuts. Enough is enough.

Family Day - 17 Years Later

 I wrote this paragraph in 2018, on the ten year anniversary of our Family Day, when Daniel received his U.S. passport:

-February 14, 2018

I remember talking with the grandparents of another young boy who was going home that day. The grandmother explained that she and her husband had to come finish the adoption process for her daughter as the younger woman was now nine months pregnant and couldn't fly. She mused on how close her grandchildren would be in age (less than one year) and on how different they would look.

"You're so lucky," she said, her eyes sweeping across our fair-skinned Daniel, playing with his siblings. "He will be able to pass," and her eyes fell to the darker-skinned baby in her arms, "and our grandchild definitely will not."

I had to pause and blink several times as I processed her statement. "Pass?" I repeated with at a higher octave. I felt like I'd been thrown back to a previous century.

"Yes, pass. He will look white, like the rest of you. This little one," and she patted his plump, dimpled arm "will not."

I never forgot her statement, couldn't believe people were thinking that way and using the word "pass" as if it was still important to pretend to be white in the 21st century. 

Fast forward to early January, when Daniel and I were discussing our new government's policies on immigrants, he shocked me by saying virtually the same thing as the woman in the embassy, "I'm lucky - I look like you guys. I don't think ICE would even look twice at me, but I am worried about my friends who are darker."

I flashed back to the day when I ignorantly overlooked her comment as aged and irrelevant. Turns out it is true now as it has been for four hundred years: the lighter your skin the easier your life. What does it say about our country that we've gone backwards? That my son, a US citizen of 17 years, has to carry his passport and US government - issued ID with him when he walks on his college campus? 

I will leave you to your own conclusions since mine are evidently short-sighted.

Attention - Seeking

 "Attention is the new money."  - Ezra Klein on the Ezra Klein Show

Sociologists have observed the shrinking attention span of modern Americans, most obvious in teenagers but impacting adults, as well. Horrified by my own increasing phone usage, I vowed to reduce it in the new year and succeeded for a whole week before the "time on your phone" stat crept up again. As I'm in the thick of it with high school swimming I tell myself that it's just swim times and playlists, but I can't quite pull the wool over my own eyes (such is my preoccupation with swimming, though, that I first wrote "pool" instead of "pull").

Any increased phone usage is not spent on news doom-scrolling, I guarantee you, since my peace of mind can't tolerate more than thirty seconds of the current headlines. My first venture back into non-frivolous podcasting (i.e. NOT "Call Her Daddy" or "Not Gonna Lie with Kylie Kelce") was my listen to Ezra Klein's show last week. 

Klein's statement "attention is the new money" caught me off-guard while at the same time hitting home. He noted that the oligarchs now on podiums and in seats of government are not your standard billionaires but the ones who control the flow of information via websites, newspapers and social media sites. Those who control information can alter reality for users of their platforms. As Klein noted, one party seems to understand this and one does not - to their great detriment.

I will leave further political observations to the experts but remind myself that Klein's concise summary runs parallel to familiar exhortations "Where the mind goes, energy flows" and the Biblical "Where your heart is, there your treasure will be also." I am trying - for now - to focus on the positive and fill my brain with positive possibilities instead of negative outcomes. I want my energy flowing to life-affirming actions that I can control. These include music I listen to, books or articles that I read, and to helping the young people I coach.

My current favorite playlist has "sun keeps on shining" (almost monday), "Life is Beautiful" (Tim McMorris) and "Feeling Alive"  (Earl St. Clair). The upbeat, positive music sinks in so much that some days I wake up singing "Life is great, life is beautiful."  Good books keep me focused on the positive power of words, and affirming young swimmers helps them reach goals. If attention is the new money, I want to build up my resources and spend them well.

Nuggets of Wisdom

My acupuncturist is an amazing healer, a fiery Colombian American and self-avowed recovering Catholic. Each time I visit her sky blue office I feel soothed and supported while at the same time challenged and uplifted. Her belief in the divine is supported by her knowledge of quantum physics (right up my alley) and she discusses frequencies with fervor.

A few treasured observations from my visit yesterday:

- "Monkeys don't like monks." This witty assessment of how Gregorian chants can be an antidote for stress and the so-called 'monkey-mind,' even for recovering Catholics (although she asked permission to play that particular arrangement, acknowledging that some raised Catholics could be anti-monk, or at least averse to chanting).

- "The Spanish word for faith is fe, which = force and energy."   I love this, as my faith has taken a beating since 2016, when I felt that Christianity was co-opted by people who act the least like Jesus of anyone I've ever met. Deyba talked about how Jesus' positive energy, his high frequency, was so powerful that he could walk into any group of people and change their existing energy field. She explains how we can raise our own frequencies with positivity and optimism, how we can also use our force and energy for good and positively alter the energy of a person or even a room of people that we encounter. This takes a lot of work, a great deal of self-care, and healthy boundaries.

I'm working on the healthy boundaries. As an oldest daughter, a woman raised in 1980's "Ronald and Nancy Reagan" America, I am certainly a people-pleaser. Deyba has been teaching me to do what I need to do for my health and my peace of mind, making choices for better sleep, fewer conflicts, positive outlook (manta - 'everything is always working out for me') and healthy eating, reading, listening.  

If we could all hum our way to higher frequencies, how much better could we be? (Apparently humming is another wonderful way to soothe and uplift). I'm prepared to wield humming, good health and Gregorian chants as we enter 2025.

PS - Thinking of everyone in CA affected by the fires and praying for quick resolution and no further loss of life.

 

Resolute in 2025

I stopped making specific new year's resolutions a few years ago, probably around the time I turned 50 and realized that the years march on regardless of my more-healthy diet or my vow to spend less time on my phone. Ideas for self-improvement float into my head year-round, and the restlessness has previously fed my need to stay busy, to do meaningful things, to deny myself rest. While these personality traits are difficult to shake, wisdom won through trying experiences has made me want to be resolute in the face of whatever comes, and not to make resolutions to make myself better for mysterious times ahead.

My friend Hana sent me this lovely poem by Donna Ashworth that expresses such sentiments better than I can, and I want to share it with you.

"On the stroke of midnight tonight,
You can resolve to be better, if you like...
To be fitter, to eat cleaner, to work harder.

On the stroke of midnight tonight,
You can resolve to become a 
Whole new you, if you so choose.

Or, you can take a moment to acknowledge
All you already are,
Because it's a lot. You're a lot.

And you deserve to be commended.

On the stroke of midnight tonight,
Perhaps you could congratulate yourself
For coping, for breaking again,
And for rebuilding again.

For catching the stones 
Life has thrown at you and using them
To build your castle that
Little bit stronger.

You have endured, my friend.

And I don't see the need to resolve 
To become a whole new you,
When you are already so very much indeed.
Happy new year. You made it.

Now let us face another 365-day turn, 
Arms wide, accepting and embracing
And 'seeing' each other
For all we are."

Happy New Year xxoo!